A Day of Firsts

Yesterday was a day of firsts for me.

I pulled Goldie's first tick off her (though I have many experiences with ticks in general, as well as ticks on dogs).

I gave my first enema, to a poor wee three-year-old child (and then gave my second).

And I had another first, which I would prefer not to discuss here, but which was more unpleasant than the enema...

But somehow today we all woke up and have survived another day.  Most of us anyway.

I had a wide realm of strange and disturbing dreams last night:

I was pregnant and hadn't yet gone to have a test.  Yikes and egads! 

And I had a plethora of strange strange dreams last night in general, including that I had spilled chocolate syrup in the work fridge  (because I had placed two iced mochas in the door  for a second, having made one for someone else, and there was a minor spill that somehow escalated, as dreams do) and I came by at night for something and found them (people at work I suppose) all having dismantled the fridge to clean it and PISSED.  

I worked in a hair salon (which is where I spilled the chocolate syrup) with the same bitches, though they were jennifer garner and others, and there was a self-curling curling iron, that you just clipped to your very long hair (and I had wonderful and very long hair) and it curled it, just rolled right up by itself, but they wouldn't show me how to use it.  And I had seen them using it, so I sort of knew, but they denied any knowledge of it.

I used it the regular way, and my hair was beautiful, but they were all ignoring me.  I couldn't see the back, and they kept telling me I hadn't gotten the red part in the back, but in the end, it didn't really matter.

And then we were all swimming in a river. Lots of dreams strung together I guess.  And later I was driving the wrong way up a highway, couldn't get into the right lane because of lots of traffic, and there was a cop on my tail, but somehow I ditched him.  I got home and whispered to one of my sons that I was on the lam, and I kept waiting to be arrested.  Eventually I realized that the cop hadn't known where I had gone.  I did  wake up this morning to realize that the cop would have gotten my license number.

But in my dreams, I got away.